Griffin Soccer Birthday Party

The Indestructible Pinata, made by Adela, the Venezuelan Electrical Engineer who's unable to work here so puts all her immense engineer brain power into making pinatas you can't break

Alice bravely played with a whole bunch of boys after previously claiming she wouldn't play.

Abraham also bravely acted as goalie, facing big boys as his opposition.

Felipe, Mateo, Gunnar, and Griffin - the soccer-loving dream team
from Argentina, Sweden, and the U.S.!

Alice's friend, Manantika from India, came to keep her company.

Abraham did not back down.

Note that Griffin is not in this picture eating pizza with everyone.
He refused to leave the soccer field. He knew a once-in-a-lifetime experience of getting all his friends on the soccer field when he had one.

Griffin and Nick, his best friend at school

Mateo, his best soccer buddy

Felipe, Mateo's brother, and another soccer whiz

Harrison, Griffin's new best friend in our building

February 27, 2011

Griffin's Blog for Griffin's Soccer Birthday Party:

When we go there there were lessons of soccer going on taught by the soccer coaches at my school .I waited a little while, until I saw a field that was clear .Me Alice and Boom got on the field and started playing around .When Bryce arrive lots of people started arriving .Nick (one of my 5 best friends in Malaysia),Till(the fastast kid in my class),Harrison(my new best friend), and a whole bunch of other people .Then the coach came in and devided us up into teams .It was a furios mach, we did 2 maches,my team won one and there team one one .I especialy proud of Boom boom ,this is how he defended ,got hit in the chest with the ball and got back up and so on .He got hit on the head and the face with the ball and and went off the field for a minute then got back on the field .after the mach we had cake .I didn't really like the cake ,I just cared about playing soccer .After that we hit the pinyata .I learned one thing from that ,I learned that 9 year old kids with a metal base ball bat can't break open one of adelas pinyatas .In the end dad had to break it open .After the party I tried to open a present but dad wouldn't let me .THE END.p.s.
Mom got a new camera shes realy exited about it .Best wishes Griffin.

In great humility, Griffin touted Boom's soccer playing prowess, but forgot to mention that it was Griffin who scored a beautiful goal.

Click HERE for video of pinata striking. Click HERE for video of Griffin's friends singing for him while he blew out the candles on the cake at his soccer party. Click HERE for a video of them playing soccer at the party. Click HERE for a video of Griffin's friends at the school cafeteria singing Happy Birthday to him on his actual birthday.

Kuala Terengganu, Malaysia: Our First Dinner at a Muslim Malaysian Home

Ken preps the kids for their role as US cultural ambassadors

Meg's Muslim Malaysian host family's home

Sepak takraw, kick volleyball

The outrageous local river shrimp are in the middle, bottom of the above photo

Grandma

Meg with her host mom, who cooked the feast

Family kids watching national geographic channel while we eat

Meg showing us how to peel fish meat off a whole, bone-filled fish using your hands.

Host mom proud to watch us gorge

Hunter tried her best to be a cultural, culinary ambassador,
even trying the chicken, after a few moments of doubt

February 3, 2011

We have never eaten at a Muslim Malaysian home. Truth is, our only intimate exposure to and friendships with Malaysians here has been through my work, which is entirely Malaysian minority -- Chinese and Indian-Malaysians. In fact, I'd been getting resentful of the Muslim Malaysian government's Muslim-only preferential policies in addition to lack of protections combined with harassment and worse of refugees here. But, I'd been thinking lately that it's better to get to know some Muslim Malaysians as individual human beings before judging them based on their government's policies.

My Fulbright student friend, Meg, deliberately chose to live with a local Muslim Malaysian family in the small beach village near the river turtles she studies. She chose to do it, even when she could have lived by herself in a lovely large apartment or home there. But, she thought that improving relations with the local community would only help her endangered river turtles -- the locals might then be more open to any initiatives she and the Turtle Conservation Centre try to get cooperation for. And, her host family invited us for tea our first day in town and for dinner the following night.

Before we walked in, Ken gave the kids a rah-rah, "let's be open to new foods and people" talk, trying to prevent any "YUCK! This food is gross," international incidents. As we walked in, I noticed that as it grew dark, only boys were outdoors, footloose and fancy free, with no restrictions on them in the dark, biking, soccer, and playing Sepak takraw, or kick-only volleyball.

Rebecca presented the host children with fabulous NYC tourist paraphernalia like I Heart NYC coin purses. The kids were bashfully both confused and pleased by the gifts. And, they watched our kids swing in the hammocks. The host mother and grandmother had been cooking ALL day, preparing a feast they'd shopped for in the local market that morning.

You can see what a spread it was. You're only seeing part of it. But, first, they sat us at the table. WITHOUT THEM. I protested, trying to explain that we wanted to sit with them. But, they insisted on standing over us, watching us as we ate. Their kids watched TV until we were done with our dinner, then they ate. All us Westerners sat together, not talking to any of the Malaysian family members over dinner. Although, we forced the mom to talk to us a bit.

I think they didn't want to sit with us because it'd felt awkward when we'd come for tea the previous day. And, I think it was awkward because they were self-conscious about their poor English. We didn't feel uncomfortable about it, happily making Meg translate our giddy, chatty overtures.

Still, we felt like we really connected with them. The host mom was downright glowing with pride over how much we all loved her food. Honestly, we haven't been thrilled with Muslim Malaysian food. But, eating it freshly prepared in someone's home is a whole other story. It was delicious. And, the grandma collects the shrimp herself, fresh from their local river using a technique of dropping a banana leaf into the water and returning later when the shrimp are stuck to the leaf, eating all the bacteria and green muck that's collected. The shrimp were phenomenal with a red chili paste coating them.

And we ate it all with our fingers!!! The kids will remember eating with our fingers the rest of their lives. And, they loved the food. Kept on asking for more to the delight of the host mom.

As we finished our meal, the grandma came in to say goodbye because she was going to the mosque to pray. She looked ghostly -- all dressed in white, talcum powder on her face, her head covered in a white scarf. Meg identifies most with her, explaining that the grandma is constantly productive -- shrimping, making textiles and cigarette wrappers, not to mention just plain, quietly in charge as the matriarch and chief provider.

We watched our children take turns melting as they became exhausted, after having such a late dinner. But, I didn't care, being so happy that they'd lived beach village life, like a real conservative Muslim Malaysian, at least once during our year here

Click here for a video of Ken's toast to the Malaysian family for hosting us.

Kuala Terengganu, Malaysia: Hot Springs with Becca and Hunter

Ken's body was made for hot springs and cold water too. He inspired us all to dip in the hot then float down the cold, shallow river, riding the mild current.

Becca put her WHOLE body in that burning hot spring water!
What an adventuress she is.

The kids got their feet in.

In this more conservative Muslim part of Malaysia, the women were fully clothed and covered when bathing. But it was acceptable to sit in the same hot springs pool of water with men there too.

This is the river we floated down, to cool off after the hot springs.
It was bliss, peaceful, fun, safe floating.

February 2, 2011

Interlude: Alice's First Girl Scout Camping Overnite in a Malaysian Jungle

Camping lite: The tents were set up before we arrived and the camping was catered.

Alice's camping troop: They made the girls stand for ridiculously long periods of time in the heat, waiting for instructions and watching flags getting raised. It felt like a cultural difference -- the tough, Asian Dad led this part and liked to make them wait until all their lines were straight and perfectly spaced.

Scouts in Malaysia, and most of the world, is co-ed. There are mostly Chinese-Malaysians in the Malaysian scouts, not Muslim or Indians. These Malaysian scouts helped us the entire overnite, with such enthusiasm, love of scouting, and respect for nature. They were inspiring. They taught us Malaysian scouting songs and arm movements around the campfire.

Raising of the school girl scouts flag.

Girl Malaysian Scouts.

Obstacle Course

Knot making. Alice was a natural.

Kite-making led by the Muslim Malaysian forest ranger.

January 20, 2011

Alice's blog:

All the Girl Scouts in my school went camping overnight in the jungle. The first thing that we did was choose our tent. We could sleep with our troop or sleep with our Mom or Dad. After I was done getting there, I swung on the rope next to a little thing of water. We learned how to tie knots. After that, we made kites and decorated them. At nighttime we did a little skit around the campfire. After that, we ate smores and went to bed. We also went on a long hike. At the end of the hike, we learned how to give people slings on their arms. Then the Malaysian scouts got two sticks of bamboo and slid the bamboo through the shirt arms in order to make a stretcher. A little girl sat on it and we carried her.

When I went to bed, I heard all these noises from the jungle. And, it was very hard to go to sleep. In the morning, I heard the sound of a loud bird. Then we got our kites and drove home in my friend's car.

In memory of Peter.

February 16, 2011

Our brother-in-law, Peter, died last week, after a long, hard fight against cancer. Truly, a fight, a brave and, often, exhausting fight. But, the real truth is that we didn't see the fight up close, we only heard about it. Being on the other side of the world is hard at moments like this, when we were losing Peter.

His entire family, friends, and Scarsdale community came through in support of him and his family. Daily delivery of dinners were organized. Friends taking turns driving him to and from chemotherapy treatments. So many visitors, keeping him both quiet or chatty company in the hospital, depending on what kind of contact he needed in the moment. Jen was amazing, showing me how to be both an effective advocate and incredibly devoted in his care.

And, it was a time for family to be there for him, Jen, and the kids. Lisa, Mary, Harvey, Barbara, and so many more threw themselves into helping them. And, they helped for a long time. We could do pretty much nothing to help, other than offer to listen and send our love and support. I'd try to remind myself that this wasn't about me, it was about Peter and his family, I felt very helpless, though, unable to be there in the same way as everyone else. And, unable to say goodbye to Peter.

The last time we saw him was in the photo above, in Greece, In fact, I think this picture's from his family's glorious stay at a Greek island. Peter showed me how to slow down, take care, and really savor such a special trip and time with my family. I'd be rushing around the house, after a day touristing Greece, and he'd return from his day trip, sit down, and really ask me, with such authentic interest, what our experience was like, really deep in the moment of our conversation together.

Peter, I send you a message in a bottle. You are well-loved and missed.

Kuala Terengganu, Turtle Release

Meg, the Fulbright ecologist extraordinaire, who we visited in Kuala Terengganu

The mysterious abrasion

Terrapin turtle

Locals refuse to hold the turtle, at first

Finally accepted

Men sit at a separate house from the Muslim women.

Muslim women sit separate, but the sexes do mix in their own home.

Turtle race and release!

February 1, 2011

Our friend Meg, the Terengganu turtle researcher, warned us before our visit that we may see NO turtles during our stay. They are the most endangered turtles in the world, these terrapin turtles in this part of Malaysia. Even though we came during nesting season, when the turtles come out of the water to lay eggs riverside, we still might not see any turtles.

But, one day as we lay on the ocean beach, Meg called to say she had 3 turtles! All 7 of us rushed there and found them in a bucket. The Turtle Conservation Centre, where Meg works, pays locals to find wayward turtles and take them to TCC to be tagged, weighed, and checked out, then released. The local beach village kids gathered with us and Meg to see the turtles.

Meg taught us all about the turtles. Click HERE to see some of her teaching. You can't help but love these turtles. They have a permanent smile on their faces and don't really bite. They have a mysterious abrasion on their bottoms, she's not sure where from. They are nearly extinct because their eggs are sold at the local markets. In fact, the eggs are such big business now that Meg discovered that the men who stay up all nite, smoking, waiting for the mom turtles to nest on shore are actually paid a salary by someone in the big city an hour away. She'd previously thought that the egg eating and selling was all loca. Now it's getting bigger, and harder to contain as a result. She offered to buy each egg for the going rate of about $2 per egg. But, she got no calls from them later.

What the turtle egg stealers do is they catch a mom coming to shore to lay an egg, then they put the mom in a shallow hole at their home. They wait til she lays her eggs, then they return her to the river (supposedly) and sell all her eggs at the market. Hence, all the turtle population is dying out with no replacements.

Meg handed us the turtles and we eagerly held them. She offered them to the local kids but we were surprised that the girls refused to hold them, initially. We thought they'd be holding turtles on a daily basis, with the turtles' river as their backyard! After a bit, a couple accepted the turtles. And we all went down to the river to release them...

Alice's blog: I was bringing the turtle down to the river. The turtle legs can kick your hands as you hold them. We were at the river. We let go of the turtles at the same time. The other two turtles got released. But, my turtle didn't know where to go. It went towards a small boat. I had to bring it all the way to the river to make it go into the water. It went into the water. Click HERE to see the turtle release.